the living well.

no words.

2011-08-27T22:27:00.000-04:00

A week ago today, my dear mother passed away.

A Saturday morning. On 20 August 2011.

I knew it was coming, but at the same time I was blindsided. Not expecting it. Thinking it would be a long time coming still. And I wish I had been correct.

My mind is still reeling.

I spent most of each day since then crying uncontrollably, until Thursday morning.

I do not know what happened Thursday morning, but it was different.

Wednesday night, I went through what had become my usual ordeal of inconsolable crying. I cried out to Jesus, imploring him to take the pain away. I just can't take it anymore.

And He heard my cry. I haven't cried inconsolably since that night. Thursday morning felt different. Thursday felt different. Thursday night felt different. The same goes for Friday. And now, Saturday. A week later.

Yes, I will cry again. And again after that. And again still. I know this. But the past few days, I know the Lord has shown me just how real and close his mercy and care are. The ache is still there, but the sting is not.

How long will it take the ache to heal? That I do not know. I told my son Sunday night, August 20 next year will most likely still hurt a lot. But I suspect that five years from now it won't hurt as much. Ten years from now it may hurt even less. And twenty years from now, August 20 may not cause me much heartache at all.

Of course, I am speculating. Hoping. But I know through this and past experiences that the Lord is all about removing stings. Healing aches. Binding wounds, and restoring broken hearts. It's his business.

He is the one I can count on always. When I feel like my photography sucks, or when there are times like these when I don't even care whether it sucks or not--I just don't want to touch my camera ever again.

Because it feels like photography, with all of its virtues and promise, brings to remembrance everything. Even the painful things.

But Jesus doesn't remember the painful things. If he removes our sins as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more, that is a good indication to me that he wants my heart to be refreshed with the wonderful memories.

He is the one I on whom I can always depend. When the music fades, or when there are times like these when I feel like it isn't healing or soothing, but it is only turning the knife.

Jesus never turns the knife. Jesus only heals. Only soothes. Always. If he gives me a song at a time when I have no desire to write ever again, that is a good indication to me that he wants my spirit to be comforted with his words.

He did give me a song. Monday night.

you see my tears

one by one

slowly they fall into space

you catch them

in your hand

you hear my cry

sorrow inside

every stream on my face

you watch as they dry

and then you say, "my love...

nothing is in vain

your tears are not wasted...

I hold them here

one by one

although darkness to you

I turn them into light

ashes surround

final it seems

and in the blink of an eye

I turn it into joy

and give it all to you...

nothing is in vain

your tears are not wasted..."

As much as I love remembering (it is a motto of mine), all I have wanted to do is forget.

The Lord is gently reassuring me that it is okay to remember.

the ianisms.

2011-08-19T23:20:00.000-04:00

Years ago, back in 2006 (oh my gosh that was FIVE years ago!), I wrote a post listing some of the funny things my oldest son had said. Take a moment if you have the time and read it (it's short). He always said hilarious things, and still does. I call them Bobbyisms.

Well, now my five-year old has been saying more and more funny things himself. I can't call them Bobbyisms, because his name isn't Bobby (haha). I call them, Ianisms.

My little Ian is a fairly precocious five-year old. Not any more precocious than the next kid, but precocious enough. He can (very carefully) read full sentences, add small numbers on his hands, and draw Transformers. He loves watching movies and playing video games. And the great Ianisms of 2011 that have come forth from his mouth have been nothing short of priceless. A sample:

"It's starting to rain, so now the zombies are going to come out." (I have NO idea. Haha)

"'Heck no' rhymes with 'techno!'" (Informing his big brother.)

"I want a turntable and some Deadmau5 records. And some Thor toys." (Announcing to his brother what he wants for Christmas.)

And, the other day, I was getting on to him about finding his socks. We were getting ready to leave the house, and he still hadn't found them (he tends to take them off and leave them in random places). This is an unfortunate routine that we have every day. He told me, in a very exasperated tone, "I can't find my socks! I've looked everywhere!" To which I replied, "Well, you obviously haven't looked everywhere because there's one of them right there on the floor in front of you!"

He looked down, saw the lone sock, and said, "Oh." Then, picking it up, he slowly backed out of my room, let out a nervous laugh and said, "Awkward."

I laughed. Out. Loud.

As I said in my post five years ago, a merry heart does good like a medicine, and my son's an excellent doctor.

Make that medicine double dosage, from two heart specialists.

an unlikely anniversary.

2011-08-18T23:01:00.000-04:00

Somehow, whenever I take a break from blogging (whether planned or otherwise), I always manage to make it back on the anniversary of the very day that I started this journal in the first place.

Most of the time, I do think of this blog as a personal diary. That is not to say that I do not appreciate all of you, my tens of readers, because I really do. I am grateful that there are people out there that want to read what I have to say and converse with me, through comments or emails. You guys are blessings.

But sometimes, I don't have much to say.

Or I do, but I have no idea how to say it.

So, I wait.

And that is how this blog is very much like a personal diary for me. When I was a little girl, I had a diary. There were periods of time when I was writing in it daily, recording every little thing. And there were other periods of time when weeks would go by before I would open my little diary again, for whatever reason.

And so, I faced July with almost no desire to ever blog again. My desire to even take Niki out of her bag and shoot waned as well. As a result, there are some weeks of my Project 52 that I missed.

I was entrenched (joyfully) in weeks of rehearsals for a show that I performed in at the beginning of this month. Weekly rehearsals they were. Two, sometimes three times per week. And I am surely glad that I was involved in that show, because singing gives me such joy and always takes my mind off of everything.

What did I have my mind on? I can't really say, because I don't really know. What I do know is, for the better part of the summer, from July on, I was dealing with depression.

I haven't felt depressed like this in years, since college. Depression was something that I had overcome and been completely free from all this time, so when it reared its ugly head I was quite frustrated. There were a few outside factors I guess... health problems with different members of our family, but that was nothing new. Work was dry the whole month of July for my husband, which was trying and annoying to say the least. But again, that wasn't something we hadn't dealt with before. I usually love summers because I love having a break from all of my teaching work (except for homeschooling which we do year-round), and last summer was so glorious I was looking forward to another season of lazy days, long nights, and lots of photographs. But this year was inexplicably different.

I'm still not one hundred percent, but I am feeling better than I was. I've sat and questioned, then questioned again, then again still, how much I truly love singing, if I should continue to use my camera, if I am raising my kids right, if we're ever going to "move on up" so to speak, if I'll ever write another song, if I am reaching any of the kids that I teach, and a few other things. Silly questions, yes, but ones that I was considering quite seriously. The answers seemed to weigh heavily on the negative side, and even through the praying and worshiping and throwing myself into my singing, I couldn't seem to shake this heavy feeling of disappointment.

I still can't explain why this feeling appeared or why it is only now beginning to disappear. I also know that I haven't communicated any of this all that effectively. Up until now, my thoughts have been even more random and jumbled. I'm not doing the best job of getting things off my chest I guess.

I haven't quit my Project 52. I still have a few weeks worth that I hadn't shared yet, and will slowly get those posted and get back on the grind. If nothing else, I know that there will be a new opportunity to finish a complete project 52 next year! Ha.

project 52, week twenty-two.

2011-06-27T14:00:00.001-04:00

Well, the minute I think I am getting back on track, it turns out it is sidetracked (yet again) that I am actually getting.

I spent this past week and the week before getting my youngest son seen and scheduled for dentist appointments. (Week Twenty-Three will include pictures from a lovely summer afternoon that we spent at the lake, the day before his cheek swelled like a balloon.) Three days in a row of medical/dental visits, including x-rays and a week's worth of antibiotics and monitoring before another dental visit this past Friday, which got rescheduled so that he can actually have sedation instead of just laughing gas (he needs to have two extractions). So, the blogging again took a back seat. Photos, however, did not.

Self-portrait. Sort of. My three-year old daughter took this. She wanted to.

My son and I went to an art exhibition in the city.

The great weekend began with an outing at a lovely river and park. This covered bridge went over the river.

The iPhonearoid of the week is here.

And the Weekly Vlog is here. I actually posted it a day late, but that way I was able to get a little bit of footage from the rehearsal for a show that I am in.

project 52, week twenty-one.

2011-06-19T00:28:00.000-04:00

Well, praise the Lord! I am finally getting around to putting up the photos from Week Twenty-One. Having that ordeal with the lack of space on my hard drive really set me back a couple of weeks ago. It took me over a week to get enough files deleted to free up more space! And once the space was finally free, I was not all that motivated to blog. But I've got to get back on the ball so I don't get overwhelmed with photos that I haven't posted yet.

Self-portrait.

Family.

Morning.

The iPhonearoid of the Week is here.

And the Weekly Vlog is here. I'm pretty proud of this one.

And now, to get weeks twenty-two and twenty-three posted...

the lazy days of summer. or, what i've been doing the past two weeks, since it clearly isn't blogging!

2011-06-18T11:43:00.000-04:00

Does summer do this to you?

You wake up, planning to do all of these extra things in addition to your normal agenda/plans for the day, and at the times when you could get to those things, you just don't? Because hey let's go to the park? Or hey let's watch a movie? Or hey let's take a nap? Or hey let's sit and look out the window for a minute, then go outside and frolic and do nothing? Or hey let's go to the lake? Or hey let's take a nap?

Well, that has been my life the past couple of weeks. I have all photos and videos available for the last couple of weeks of my Project 52, yet I have been to darn lazy to actually post them. I have had little to no motivation to blog. Soooo different from last summer, when I was in the midst of all of these creative projects and blogging so much it seemed (a 365 project will do that).

So, my sincere apologies to you guys! These last couple of weeks have been busy, but a different kind of busy. A busyness of just living, making the most of my free time. How have I made the most of it? By schlepping my oldest son to all of these different parties/get-togethers/social activities three times a week the past two weeks, taking my kids to the beach, healing sunburns, rehearsing and leading worship a few times at my church, trying to catalogue quickly this bevy of creative ideas scrolling across my head, teaching voice students, and going to rehearsals twice a week for a show in which I am performing in August. (My weekly vlog for last week is actually a snippet of my music rehearsal for that, so you will hear me singing when I post it this weekend.)

And even dealing with an unfortunate tooth infection. (My five-year old son has to get some teeth removed next week.)

And yes, taking photos and videos all along the way.

I will spend the weekend getting the rest of my Project 52 posts up, then next week I hope to catch up on all of the lovely blogs that I love to read and follow. In the meantime, I am about to head back out the door with my family to a three-hour rehearsal in the city, while they will be across the street at a music and food festival.

I will definitely be getting back on my regular posting schedule soon, and catching up with you guys and finding out what you have been doing via your lovely blogs. I hope your summer is going swimmingly.

Much love.

project 52, week twenty.

2011-06-01T23:47:00.000-04:00

Hallelujah! It looks like I'm in the clear to get these next couple of posts completed, because I've apparently FINALLY cleared enough space on my computer. So, although Week Twenty was two weeks ago, HERE IT IS!

Self-portrait.

My son, during two of his three performances.

And his turntables.

The iPhonearoid of the Week for Week Twenty is here.

And the Weekly Vlog is here.

Gonna take my tired butt to bed, and get Week Twenty-One on the blog tomorrow. Then I'll be all caught up.

project 52, week nineteen.

2011-05-29T23:49:00.000-04:00

Week Nineteen.

After a harrowing week of what seemed to be endless deleting of files, I have finally cleared enough space to at least complete this one week. I actually enjoyed looking back and remembering what I did two weeks ago, since I had already forgotten!

Self-portrait.

Family.

The walls of Passion City Church.

My iPhonearoid of the Week for Week Nineteen can be found here.

And, the Weekly Vlog is in two parts.

Part One is here.

Part Two is here.

You don't want to miss this vlog. It's the best one I've done so far this year. Very emotional, but POSITIVE.

Off to do some more deleting, so that I can (hopefully) get Week Twenty posted tomorrow.

Night, folks.

basic space.

2011-05-29T19:59:00.000-04:00

Ahhhh. My lovely tens of readers. How I've missed you.

What have I been up to, you ask? Well, a lot's been afoot the past couple of weeks. Not the least of which is my son graduating eighth grade and becoming a high schooler, officially. I am officially homeschooling a high schooler. Now I've got to think about transcripts and credits and accreditation and stuff for real. Oh lawd.

And the past two weeks have been rife with activity. Rife. With. Activity. Four end-of-year presentations, two graduation ceremonies (some of my students graduated this year), an awards ceremony, a homeschool-day outing, three last-days-of-school (with events), and parties. Sigh.

It's been great fun, but tiring.

And yes, I still took pictures. And videos.

Which brings me to a song that I like. A lot.

It's a song by The xx, called Basic Space. I've loved it for several months, along with several other songs by this group. But the title is quite a propos to this post, and my small blogging hiatus.

Squishy, my Macbook (her official name is Elaine. Long story...), has been sorely lacking in basic. space.

I literally worked on clearing space on her all of last week. And yes, I have an external hard drive, but I hadn't actually been about the business of deleting files off of my computer after I had backed things up. Soooo, I could not upload any videos or photos until I had done so. As it stands at the moment, I have done so enough to get ONLY Week Nineteen blogged this evening. Which means that I have some more deleting to do before I can blog Week Twenty. And I am actually ON Week Twenty-One. Gaaaahhh.

But I will be the most determined worker bee and get it done, and you will have Week Nineteen to read tonight. Yay.

In the meantime, I leave you with some other 'basic' things... basic goals of mine for this summer.

make an art canvas with (or without) my son every one or two weeks
get back to my regular art journaling that I was doing last summer
make tons of great food utilizing as much of this magic sauce as I can
walk off some pounds and get in better shape
make music, then make more music
read daily
journal daily
pray daily (though that is a perpetual goal/habit, not just for the summer)
keep remembering. With Niki. Because as I've said before, I love remembering.

I hope all of you out there in Blogreaderland are gearing up for a splendiferous Memorial Day. Much love.

[Oh, and if you've never watched any of my weekly vlogs before, you won't want to miss Week Nineteen. It's in two parts, and it's the best one I have done so far. I talk about my wonderful Master's Academy students, and how God used them at the end of the year to bring healing to my heart. Trust me; it's good. Really good. Unless you don't like to see people cry, ever. In which case you shouldn't watch it.]

project 52, week eighteen.

2011-05-10T23:25:00.000-04:00

I've got a lot to say on this post. Forgive me if I ramble a bit.

As you know, I've been having many ups and downs emotionally since the beginning of March, when I had my mother admitted into hospice care. (She refused to go back to dialysis at the end of February). I have been so moved by comments and well-wishes that people have given me. It may not seem like much to you, but it really is encouraging, and I appreciate it.

In addition to truly learning to live day by day for a completely different reason than ever before (every day that I do not get a call from the nursing home is a good day), I have really fought a mental battle... since the beginning of Spring... fighting the urge to relegate this taking pictures thing to a hobby and shelving that hobby. I have been frustrated with my lack of creative motivation, and I know that said lack is due to having my thoughts elsewhere. It's been kind of difficult to focus on getting out with Niki and enjoying time when my mind is on counting down the minutes of each day and getting to the end with a "Whew. No phone call. Thank God."

But I love photography too much to quit. And I feel like I have something different to offer, so I am going to keep pressing until I push through. If weeks go by without a photo gig I won't sweat it (though I LOVE getting hired to take pictures, and expect to see a lot of work this summer); I will continue to nurture my relationship with my non-human bff. This Project 52 has been my saving grace the last month or so, as it has saved me from halting my photo-taking altogether.

Speaking of mothers and creative motivation (sort of), my son wrote me the most amazing note on Mother's Day, which, by the way, was a wonderful day. To say that I needed to hear this (or read it, rather) would be an understatement, and I have read it over and over again since he posted it. Before I share this week's photos, I am going to share with you all how wonderful my son is (sorry about the smaller font)...

"What can I say? I could say that you are an amazing mother. I could say that you are the greatest mother that anyone could ever have. I could say that you are blessed. Well, I can say these things because they're true. You are such an amazing person. You're full of talent, wisdom, and kindness. I see why every single one of your students enjoys you. They appreciate your kindness; they appreciate the fact that you care about each and every one of them without leaving any out. On top of this, you have an amazing gift of flourishing creativity which leaves people in awe and makes them want to have the same thing. Then, you have amazing character which completely influences your students, who want you to influence them. I know that maybe it might not seem like it, but your students love you. More than you can know. How can I say this? Because I AM one of those students. But I am also your son, so...

Whether you realize it or not, YOU inspire me everyday. You encourage me to be confident in who I am. You encourage me to work hard. And you encourage me to love. If it weren't for you, I probably wouldn't have known what "love" is when I did. You're such an amazing mother. Every time mothers day comes along, I always cherish the good memories that we have had together. And I cherish the good times we have had as our family has grown. You have been such a blessing to me. Even though Mother's day comes around only once a year, I sincerely cherish you every single day. I love you, Mommy. Happy Mother's day. ♥"

Self-portrait.

Oldest son on stage, with his hair hiding his face.

End-of-year drama performance (one of several) at Master's Academy Woodstock.

My iPhonearoid of the week is here.

And my Weekly Vlog is here.

Have a great week, folks.

project 52, week seventeen.

2011-05-10T22:16:00.000-04:00

Well, it has been an eventful couple of weeks.

Right after I said I would get Week Seventeen posted forthwith, I experienced a surge in oh-my-gosh-I-forgot-we-have-such-and-such-tomorrow-night-gaaahhh-I'll-be-getting-home-late-AGAIN activity, for several afternoons and evenings in a row.

Folks, I've been beat. Like, for real.

The pictures and videos have been sitting on my computer and iPhone, waiting patiently to be shared. Luckily, they aren't upset with me. I hope you won't be too upset either.

Buuuut the good news is, I'm posting TWO blogs TONIGHT! Then I'll be back on schedule! Yay!

So here goes.

Me. It was taken by my husband.

Several family shots. Because we had some fun times this weekend.

And. Out in the city.

My iPhonearoid of the week? You don't want to miss it.

And you don't want to miss my weekly vlog. (It's my son being a street performer for a few minutes!)

motherhood photo challenge.

2011-05-10T22:00:00.001-04:00

This is me, being proud of my son. Plain and simple.

This photo was entered into the I Heart Faces Photo Challenge.

project 52, week sixteen.

2011-05-02T14:53:00.000-04:00

This week went in by in a blur. Or, more like a puff of smoke. Like the puff of smoke that's left when the Road Runner runs off from Wile E. Coyote. I don't remember much of what happened, except that my son was in a play, we went to a Good Friday concert and nearly froze our butts off (in almost-May, in Atlanta) enjoying the great music, and some other stuff.

I took some pictures.

Selfie. My poor finger. It's healed up now.

Family.

At the Good Friday Concert.

The iPhonearoid of the week can be found here.

The Weekly Vlog can be found here.

Until next time, folks.

[Due to a broken wireless router, I did not get this up when I said I would. Bought a new router yesterday, and so my internet connection is back up consistently. Week Seventeen will be up tonight or tomorrow.]

project 52, week fifteen.

2011-04-24T23:29:00.000-04:00

Well, the good news is I have all photos and videos done to be completely caught up with my Project 52 posts. It's already after eleven though and I am trying to keep from falling asleep here on the couch, so I think I'll do this post tonight and save the other one for tomorrow.

We've been running like maniacs the past couple of weeks. Last weekend my son had a formal, and this weekend he was the lead in a play. He had tech rehearsal for the play every night this week. We're all exhausted.

I did get some nice photos last week (the week leading up to the formal).

Self-portrait.

M'ijo.

My little one, fishing for the first time.

Out in the city.

My iPhonearoid of the week is here,

and my Weekly Vlog is here.

See you tomorrow.

project 52, week fourteen.

2011-04-18T23:52:00.000-04:00

Sigh.

Sooo, last week came and went, and my Project 52 post did not materialize for you guys.

So, fourteen weeks into this thing, and I'm behind.

I have all of the elements and had them together last Sunday night. I just... didn't... post it.

I've been lacking a little in the motivation department.

Not sure why... it just feels like I've been moving in slow motion since last week. Getting a call from the nursing home about making funeral arrangements (just in case) did NOT help. Ugh.

But, regardless of how I felt, I still hung out with Niki, and we still took pictures.

Yep. Sometimes I fail to help Niki out and what I end up with is crap. And sometimes I just don't even feel like any do-overs.

Ahhh. But my kids. They make every day bright.

And that's saying a lot, on days like these.

Here is the iPhonearoid of the week.

And here is the Weekly Vlog.

(I have everything finished for this week's post as well, but will probably post it tomorrow or Wednesday. Bear with me; I'm getting back on track.)

Sigh. Well...

2011-04-12T23:11:00.001-04:00

Tonight marks the sixth evening in a row that I have been out doing something and getting home dog tired.

All of the elements for my Project 52 post have been ready since Sunday, including my crappy self-portrait (and trust me, it is CRAP), but I had technical difficulties getting my weekly vlog to load on Sunday. And I have not tried to reload it since, thanks to being out every evening.

Soooo, in lieu of a crock pot Wednesday post (since I won't be cooking tomorrow), I'll take tomorrow evening, my first evening home in a WEEK, to get that post finished and up.

And I'd also like to say thank you to so many of you who have spoken kind words to me. You are all such a blessing.

I'm off to sleep. A deep sleep.

-natty posted this using BlogPress from her iPhone.

food. and acceptable, happy mistakes.

2011-04-06T23:17:00.000-04:00

Okay. So, recap.

I did actually cook a meal in the crock pot. Last Wednesday. (Tonight, I did what has become a very good stand-by in my house: whole roast chicken.)

I made barbecued pork ribs.

I didn't take any pictures due to being in a MEGA-hurry. But I got the ribs, along with a large onion cut into large sections, and some random (really random) spices I had laying around in my cabinets, a bottle of Cattlemen's Barbecue Sauce, either Kansas City style or Memphis style (can't remember), and probably half a cup of water, into my pot and cooked it.

It was great. Country-style ribs are also a great stand-by in the crock pot, just like pot roast. Here is the recipe from the last time that I cooked them.

And now, pictures.

I am going to confess something to you. This year (so far), it seems like my personal photographic output has been made up of a lot of... duds.

Gaaahhh.

Soooo, I have learned, very quickly, to go back over the images I have shot and study them a little more carefully, with the objective of maybe finding something that is salvageable, or something that I actually connect with emotionally.

And yep, that was an awful sentence. It happens sometimes with me. Sigh. Back to salvageable, emotionally-connected duds.

(For some reason, the photos in this post are showing up distorted and I do not know how to fix it. They are not appearing the way they normally do in my posts. And THIS is why I am desperately seeking a new blog design so that I can show my images full-size/full-resolution/allofthatstuff.)

project 52, week thirteen.

2011-04-05T01:18:00.000-04:00

Hallelujah, I finally got this done.

Self-portrait.

Family.

Haven't posted a good sign photo in a while.

And an old shack.

Be sure to check out my iPhonearoid of the Week.

And don't forget to check out my Weekly Vlog.

Have a lovely Spring week, folks.

confessions. and hopes.

2011-04-04T20:50:00.000-04:00

This post won't be long. I promise.

I am sitting here trying to motivate myself to make my vlog for the past week. I apologize to all of you; I have not felt like doing it. Spring Break has hit me with a desire to really BREAK. From just about everything, save cooking and homeschooling my kids.

I have continued to shoot, and need to upload a wagon-load of images tonight so that I can complete my Project 52 post. It will be a day late, but it will be done.

I have spent most of the month fighting to hold on to the peace of the Lord. It has been so tempting to writhe my hands in worry... about my mother, about other family drama that has presented itself the past couple of weeks, et cetera. Some days are better than others. But I am always conscious of my goal: to strive to enter the rest of the Lord. That is the only striving I am ever to do.

I am never without hope. And I have good reason to continue in that hope; my mother has lasted a month when I was told she most likely wouldn't last a week. She is eating more, and seems more aware. She held my hand so tightly yesterday evening when we went to visit her, and I didn't want to let go.

And new opportunities are coming my way. That's always welcome. Photographic opportunities, as well as musical opportunities. Mind you, I will not be taking on things at the expense of my family time, but I think some of these things will be great creative outlets, as well as a means to add a few more dollars to my little change purse. Again, always welcome.

I have been remiss in posting my crock pot meals. My deepest apologies. Three weeks ago I roasted a whole chicken. It was delicious, but wasn't cooked in the crock pot. Two weeks ago we went out to eat. Last week, I did cook in my crock pot. Barbecued pork ribs. I will write a little about it this coming Wednesday, as I am not sure I will be cooking that day.

And. I have gone on with my homeschooling and have shared precious little. Gah. I must remedy that this week.

I do have a lot to say and share; it's just that at times (more often than not here lately) I am so jumbled in my thoughts and emotions that I don't know where to start. And I am not going to front like everything is okay.

But everything is okay. At this moment. So I will take that and run with it and try to get this Project 52 post finished tonight.

While watching the basketball game.

Many blessings to you all, my tens of readers.

project 52, week twelve.

2011-03-28T22:00:00.000-04:00

I'm a day late posting this, even though I had all of the elements ready on Sunday night. My computer started running slowly due to not having enough memory available, and once I finally freed up some room, I just decided to wait until today to post everything.

In my weekly vlog, I talk about what has been troubling me this month. I didn't get as in depth about my feelings as I had planned, because it is still too difficult to really talk about it.

There are some things that give me solace. Little things, like Papaya Mango Snapple, my french press, my walking playlist on my iPod, seeing all of the lovely things in my Pinterest feed, and Instagram notifications.

And there are the constant things.

Big things, like Jesus and the presence of the Holy Spirit, which I have been able to feel so heavily this month, much to my comfort. The Lord knows exactly what we need, always.

And my husband and children. They are my anchor, and I delight in pouring myself into them, even when it feels like it's not much.

Music.

And, remembering. With Niki's help.

Self-portrait.

M'ijo.

Of interest, because I love trees.

My iPhonearoid of the week is over here.

And my Weekly Vlog is over here.

Have a lovely week, everyone.

project 52, week eleven.

2011-03-22T23:49:00.000-04:00

I'm a couple of days late getting last week's installment of Project 52 posted. I explained why in my Weekly Vlog. I haven't felt very energetic today... my little Ladybug has been running a temp since yesterday, and we've both been coughing incessantly. Fun.

Anywho, here are a few snapshots from last week.

Self-portrait. In the ER. At 1:00. A.M.

My beautiful boy.

And some, like, hospital stuff.

My iPhonearoid of the week? It's nice. Check it out.

And as I said above, my Weekly Vlog explains why I'm so late in getting this done.

Have a wonderful rest of the week, folks.

project 52, week ten.

2011-03-14T23:30:00.000-04:00

A better week for me emotionally, but almost a bust when it came to shooting! I seemed to be so busy for much of the week that I didn't shoot much! Luckily, I did shoot SOMETHING.

Me.

My daughter.

My class. (One of them, anyway.)

And, some obscure beauty found in a miserably wet and cold day.

My iPhonearoid of the week is here.

And my Weekly Vlog is here.

Have a wonderful week, folks.

close your eyes, and make a hope.

2011-03-12T14:24:00.000-05:00

Have you ever seen the Cedric the Entertainer segment of the Kings of Comedy film? At the beginning, where he talks about how black folks "don't hope, we wish?" Well, I was thinking about that randomly today, and noticed how I seem to do that often. I think it's a problem.

Why? Because faith is not the substance of things wished for. And we are not instructed to not lose wishes.
The Bible does not tell us that wishes will not lead to disappointment. It says that hope will not lead to disappointment. A certain kind of hope will not lead to disappointment.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. -Romans 5:3-5

I often find myself still defaulting to wishing mode when troubles arise. I wish I could take care of this. I wish I could do more to help. I wish I could make this go away. I wish I had just a few more clients. I wish I had just a few more students. I wish I had more gigs. I wish I had more time. I wish my efforts at "whatever task" were more successful.

I have a lot of wishes.

I think there is an inherent sense of hopelessness in wishing. You don't really believe what you wish for will happen, because you have been disappointed so many times or had the wind taken out of your sails so many times you think that this is your lot in life.

Hope, however, looks forward to. There is an inherent sense of expectation in hoping. Things may not be great, in fact they could be downright negative, but there is still a feeling inside of you that expects and looks forward to circumstances improving. That is what gives birth to faith.

And THAT, hope, is what I want to default to more often than not and eventually always.

The events of the past couple of weeks have had me reflecting on this. I am certainly out of the habit of navel-gazing, but my reactions this week and last week have led me to question some behaviors. It is time for a conscious change, if I am to live out my one little word for this year and be free.

crock pot wednesday: forgetting photos. and the dried basil.

2011-03-11T16:43:00.000-05:00

Yes, it's Friday and I am just getting around to sharing what I did for dinner on Wednesday. Again. Sometimes, it just happens that way. I totally meant to write my post Wednesday night, of course, but I fell asleep way early. I don't know why, but I have felt completely wiped out the past few days.

Anyway, I also didn't take any pictures Wednesday morning, due to being in an extreme hurry. My apologies.

I revisited the Chicken Cacciatore. I noticed it was one of my most popular posts and got inspired and thought, "Hey. That was pretty good. Maybe I'll just do that again, since I have almost everything I need for it." I literally needed five small items to complete the meal.

Okay. Now that I am thinking about it, I guess I needed more than what I had on hand. Forget what I said.

This time, I remembered almost everything. Doh.

I failed to remember the dried basil. Other than that, I did everything that I did the last time, except this time I did not omit the tomato paste and I used boneless, skinless chicken thighs, which is what I normally use.

It still came out pretty tasty. I think I will make this one more time before the school year is out, and I will be adding the dried basil, along with crushed rosemary, minced garlic, and dried parsley. And a larger can of tomato paste.

And now, to figure out what to cook next Wednesday. Why is it getting so hard?

project 52, week nine.

2011-03-07T23:45:00.000-05:00

This week came and went, and I was happy to see it go. It was a difficult one for me.

I did not stop shooting, though.

Me.

Kidlets.

My town.

It's a very, very, very fine town.

My iPhonearoid of the Week is another selfie, right here.

And my Weekly Vlog is right here.

Have a wonderful week, folks.

in like a lion. and needing the courage of a lioness.

2011-03-05T23:02:00.000-05:00

It rained all day today. I took a few pictures with my iPhone in the evening, but the only time I took Niki out of her cozy home was when I went out for a very early dinner with my husband and kidlets. My oldest was in an all-day rehearsal for a play in which he is the lead, and we had a few hours to kill until he was finished. It was a lazy Saturday.

I did not cook a crock pot meal on Wednesday, because I was running way behind schedule that morning. We ended up getting take-out that night. I have no idea yet what I will be cooking this coming Wednesday, so I am up for suggestions.

This has been a difficult week. Some events have transpired that have left me feeling completely drained. I really do not feel like writing about it at the moment, but I have worked overtime this week to remember where my help and strength are found. Without keeping my thoughts fixed on the Lord, the feelings of helplessness are overwhelming.

I probably will eventually write about what I am feeling, when I think I can put it into words. I can't right now. But even though this is now a blog that I know people are reading, it is still a personal journal and I do want to write my thoughts down here. Once I can collect them.

Have you ever had those days (or weeks) where you wanted each day to pass by super-slowly, because you didn't want the next day to come?

It's been one of those weeks.

project 52, week eight.

2011-02-28T22:37:00.000-05:00

The weather was so great, and the relaxing thanks to break was so great, that I didn't even blog for four days straight.

But I did take pictures. Niki's almost always by my side, or at the very least, within close reach.

Self-portrait.

Me and my mommy.

A pretty little Rosebud.

I think I like driving way too much.

My iPhonearoid of the week is another self-portrait. And oddly enough, it's lovely. You should see it. It's right here.

And My Weekly Vlog is right here.

Have a great week, folks.

the joy of love, final days.

2011-02-28T22:18:00.000-05:00

It is the final day of The Joy of Love, hosted by Kelly Willette, and as soon as I finish writing this post I am going to go downstairs and share all of this month's posts with my husband.

The last theme was "the future." And for this, I am posting a simple photo taken by a friend of ours at a wedding.

And here is where I get cheesy. So, indulge me for a moment, if you don't mind.

We are bonded for life. We have weathered every storm imaginable, and will continue to do so. We will raise our family, see our oldest graduate from high school in a few years, slowly (hopefully) watch each child, one by one, leave our nest, and eventually usher in a new era of our life with grandchildren.

We will see things, do things, say things, and make things that we hope will have a lasting impact on the people around us.

We will continue to smile, cry, and laugh together and even sometimes quarrel together.

We will continue to ride in the car together, watch TV together, dine together, and sit and do nothing together.

We will gaze into each others' eyes and get lost, knowing it's okay because we have already found each other.

We will watch our hands grow old and wrinkly as they hold one another tightly over the years.

We will refer to each other as "honey" or "baby" at least a million more times.

And we will continue to love and serve God, love and serve others, and love and serve each other.

That is our future.

the joy of love, day twenty-five.

2011-02-28T21:59:00.000-05:00

"When do you love them best?" That is the theme for day 25 of The Joy of Love.

When I finally sat down and read my email for this day's theme, the day had been over for a couple of days! So, I've had some catching up to do, and today, my husband is not really in the mood for me to be snapping pictures of him. Long day. For both of us.

Fortunately, I do have some recent photos that effectively convey who my sweet husband is, and when I feel like my love for him is almost too much for me to take without feeling like I am going to burst. Those times are the precious moments when I really sit (or stand) and observe him being Daddy.

He is a good one.

the joy of love, day twenty-four.

2011-02-28T21:27:00.000-05:00

The theme for day 24 of The Joy of Love is,

"where."

As in, where we fell in love.

Well, here it is.

(And no, this isn't a photo of that exact time, because I took no pictures then. This is more recent, and representative of where and how we fell in love.)

One day I'll tell you the whole story. It is sweet.

the joy of love, day twenty-three.

2011-02-27T22:35:00.000-05:00

The theme for day 23 of The Joy of Love is,

"Facebook."

I had planned on using the photo that I took of my husband that he actually used as his profile picture (and is still using, almost a year later), but when I went to the Facebook photo album in which it is located, I found this one.

Sigh. I love it. So much. I have many favorites, but had all but forgotten about this one. And it is definitely a favorite.

the joy of love, day twenty-two.

2011-02-27T22:12:00.000-05:00

Hello, everyone! For the past several days I have been having a blast, enjoying some needed down-time with my family, resting, and visiting with friends. I've got a few days' worth of blogging to catch up on, and am starting this evening.

Before I get on with my Joy of Love photo, a couple of updates...

I did make a crock pot meal last Wednesday. It was a fail for me. Not because my family didn't eat it or said that they hated it, but because I couldn't taste it.

Or smell it. Due to heavy sinus congestion.

I knew going into it that I wouldn't be able to gauge how good the meal was, and that, coupled with the fact that I was really just cleaning out my freezer and throwing stuff together with random spices out of my cabinet, meant that I wouldn't be able to tell you all anything about it really, except that my guys ate it and said it was fine. I might as well have been eating paper soup. So, I didn't write about it. I will tell you, it was pretty much chicken thighs, shrimp, large potatoes, and a heap of spices that I just randomly grabbed... cajun spice, basil (I think?), Old Bay seasoning... can't remember what all I did.

And I still don't know what I will be cooking this Wednesday.

Also, about the button above. My first entry into the I Heart Faces challenge yielded an honorable mention, meaning my shot was one of Angie and Amy's favorites! I'm psyched. I'll be putting that button in my sidebar.

And NOW, on to day 22 of The Joy of Love. The theme was, "face."

I almost scrapped getting a portrait of my husband altogether, because he was being rather difficult that night. He did not want me to take his photograph, and would not be still, or take it seriously for any extended amount of time. I did manage to get a couple of useable shots, thank goodness, and here is one of them.

phone photo challenge.

2011-02-22T21:43:00.000-05:00

Ever since I got my first iPhone three years ago, I have fallen in love with iPhoneography and the convenience of having something handy to take quick snapshots when a DSLR might not be readily available or practical. I quickly grew fascinated with my phone's photographic potential due to the large number of apps available in the Apple App Store. And I have had some good fortune with some of my shots, as they have been featured on other sites in the past, including the CameraBag site.

Many of my images last year during my 365 photo project were iPhonearoids, and this year for my Project 52 I include a link to my iPhonearoid of the week each week. This is the first time this year that I am entering an iPhone shot in a photo challenge. It is the I Heart Faces weekly photo challenge. I have wanted to enter one of their challenges for over a year, and have always somehow forgotten or gotten sidetracked with other things. Hopefully this will be the first of many I Heart Faces challenges that I will enter.

The above photo is, to date, my most popular post on Instagram, and one of my many popular posts on Posterous. It's my five year old Fro Magnum, back in October when we were on our AWESOME family vacation in Chicago (see my posts here and here), at the Navy Pier. This, of course, was long before we cut his hair.

This image is my entry into the I Heart Faces Cell Phone Photo Challege. It was shot and edited entirely with my iPhone.

the joy of love, day twenty-one.

2011-02-21T23:39:00.000-05:00

The theme for today is "hands." Self-explanatory.

I love my husband's hands. They work; they've even toiled at times. They make things and they fix things. They hold, caress, and comfort. They are strong, but have every capability of being as gentle as possible.

And I love that his hands always want to hold mine.

the joy of love, day twenty.

2011-02-21T23:34:00.000-05:00

The theme for day twenty is "when they're home."

When my husband is home from work, there isn't really anything super-glamorous that goes on. What does go on, though, always gives me a sense of peace, that everything is right with the world.

Dishes get pulled out so that I can make dinner.

Laundry gets done.

He makes sweet tea.

Kidlets hang out, watching Mommy cook...

...and playing.

project 52, week seven.

2011-02-20T23:55:00.000-05:00

I must say, this has been a banner week. No sarcasm this time. Just pleasant times all around. Lovely weather, and fun times spent with family and friends. And this is probably the most rewarding week (possibly even month) of blogging that I have ever had. Participating in The Joy of Love this month has definitely filled some voids in inspiration.

Snapshots for the week:

Self-portrait.

Family.

And what an awesome car. If I had the money, I would buy it.

My iPhonearoid of the week is lovely. You should see it.

And here is my weekly vlog.

Have a great week, folks.

the joy of love, day nineteen.

2011-02-20T23:41:00.000-05:00

The theme for today is "when they're gone."

When my husband is at work, my little ones get a lot of playtime. My son studies. I also do schoolwork with my five year old. He and his little sister greatly enjoy it. They love to read.

the joy of love, day eighteen.

2011-02-19T23:43:00.000-05:00

The theme for day eighteen of The Joy of Love is:

"going out."

We don't go out on date nights very often. As a matter of fact, I think in all of 2010 we went out on a date... I want to say four times, all of which happened to be in the last three months of the year. I wish we could do one every month, or once a week for that matter, but it's just difficult sometimes to make it happen. We have, however, seen some good fortune with date nights the last couple of months.

We didn't go out on our anniversary because I was sick with strep throat, so we rainchecked that until the last week of December. The next time we went out was actually in January (lucky us!), because the restaurant that we went to for our belated anniversary dinner (with a gift card) gave us our meal for free as compensation for the ultimate in bad service. With the gift card that we had for said restaurant still unused, we were able to go out AGAIN, and did so later on that same month.

We, of course, went out for Valentine's Day, although we had our two younger children with us (the oldest was at a high school dance). But we still have the opportunity to go out on another date soon, for another free meal, thanks to the above gift certificate.

Once we've used that one, we will have been out FOUR times since January. Score.

the joy of love, day seventeen.

2011-02-19T23:30:00.000-05:00

Today's theme is "staying in."

Most evenings, we are chilling in the living room, watching TV indirectly. I say indirectly because I am usually on my computer (like I am right now, blogging) and my husband is buried in his iPhone. But we are in the same room!

This project is being hosted by Kelly Willette.

the joy of love, day sixteen.

2011-02-17T22:32:00.000-05:00

The theme for today is "us." I am supposed to show you an image (or images) that says, "this is us."

So, here we are.

By many accounts, we would be considered an odd couple.

Although our backgrounds and life stories are very different, we spent our childhoods living not very far from each other in the city of Atlanta.

One of us is willing to try new foods, and the other is fairly picky (though not nearly as picky as when we first got married, which is a good thing).

One of us is the youngest of seven children, and the other is an only child.

One of us experienced early in life the pain of losing a parent.

We both have had our hearts broken, and have suffered through the pain that results from divorce.

We both know what it is like to feel like we are all alone in the world.

We both have a fierce love for our children.

And we both share the same view of what marriage is and should be, and are committed to each other and each other only, for the rest of this life.

That's us, more or less, in a nutshell.

crock pot wednesday: the pot roast, revisited.

2011-02-17T22:05:00.000-05:00

And it will probably be revisited at least a couple more times this season, because it's always so good.

Pot roast is an excellent standby crock pot meal. Sure, I'm always trying to think of new things or look for new recipes that I haven't tried before, but when I'm at a loss, I can always go right back to good old pot roast. That's what I did yesterday.

I started out by chopping a large, sweet onion into a few sections.

I tossed the onion in with my frozen chuck roast.

Then, I chopped a few parsnips into large chunks.

I really love parsnips, but my husband and son have decided that they are not crazy about them.

I like that they have a texture that is much like a potato, but they are sweeter than carrots. They satisfy my sweet tooth while making me feel good about having vegetables.

I seasoned with a bunch of stuff.

Seasoned salt, hamburger seasoning, black pepper, generous helpings of Worcestershire sauce and steak sauce. Then I added (I think) five cups of water. Cooked everything for eight hours.

Once we got home from Master's Academy, we still had an hour left for the meat to cook. So, I added these.

The purple ones are fun. Their flesh is purple. And the red ones in the bag? Very sweet, which I personally like.

The whole thing was yummy. I am always grateful for yummy meals. I also had the bestie over for dinner, as well as an additional guest, and they enjoyed it too. Being able to cook food that is enjoyable for people besides just my family makes me happy, because I do love to entertain.

I had all of the seasonings on hand, so what I had to buy was the roast, as well as the potatoes, parsnips, and onion. And, since I bought the roast at Target a couple of weeks ago, the only thing I bought this week for the meal were the vegetables. I seem to have misplaced my receipt from Publix, so I won't list the price of the onion because I cannot remember. I do, however, remember exactly how much the other food ingredients cost.

Roast: $8.58

Parsnips: $2.50

Potatoes: $3.99

TOTAL FOR (ALMOST) EVERYTHING THAT WENT INTO MY CROCK POT: $15.07

Let me just say, the last few weeks I have had people come up to me and tell me that they've either enjoyed reading my crock pot posts, or they have tried one of my crock pot meals and liked it. That really does my heart good, so thanks. (And these are people who have never commented, so I wonder if I have even more than tens of readers! haha)

And now, to decide what to cook for next week.

the joy of love, day fifteen.

2011-02-15T23:43:00.000-05:00

Today's theme is "kiss."

That's easy enough. Let's see if I can keep the camera straight...

This project is hosted by Kelly Willette.

the joy of love, day fourteen.

2011-02-15T23:36:00.000-05:00

I did not get to post the photo for day fourteen on Valentine's Day, as the whole evening was a busy one. My oldest son was at a high school dance, and so the kidlets accompanied my husband and me to Applebee's for dinner. We chose Applebee's because a.) it was close by, b.) we wanted to go SOMEWHERE for Valentine's Day but were both so tired from work we didn't want anything too fancy or formal, c.) we knew the kids would devour the mac and cheese there, and d.) we knew they had a good blondie for dessert that we could all split. We do have a gift certificate for a fancy dinner at a nice restaurant, so hopefully we can take advantage of that later on in the week. There's no food like free food.

Anywho, before I move on with the topic for day fourteen, I do want to share my husband's Valentine's Day present with you.

Untitled from natalyn bradshaw on Vimeo.

I've discovered that I really enjoy making videos for him. Even though it took me three tries to get this right because I wouldn't stop coughing (gaaahhhh!!!), it was fun to do.

And now, on to the theme, which is "wedding band and jewelry."

My husband and I are the types of people who never take off our rings. In fact, I tried to take mine off Valentine morning because my finger was itching really bad and had the hardest time getting it off. I didn't pull it all the way off; I just waited until my finger felt better then struggled to get the ring back down my finger. Our rings are not just jewelry; they are part of us, an extension of who we are and a potent reminder of our covenant and our security. I really love that.

This project is sponsored by Willette, and I know I've said it before but I will say it again. It has been so much fun.

project 52, week six.

2011-02-14T00:43:00.000-05:00

This was a fun week. A few days of lovely weather, a great weekend, time spent with good friends, and always lovely family time. I have a few more snapshots than usual this week.

Selfie.

Family.

Another family portrait. This one isn't great technically but I kinda don't care. I kinda love it anyway. I pretty much love it anyway. All the way.

My son got a new vinyl album.

A gorgeous Sunday afternoon at the park.

Cotton.

And the fun continues. I've got a slammin' iPhonearoid of the week for you guys. Go check it out right here.

Annnd my Weekly Vlog this week was actually a song I did for my husband, for Valentine's Day. An Ingrid Michaelson cover.

Have a wonderful week, folks.

the joy of love, day thirteen.

2011-02-14T00:17:00.000-05:00

The topic for day thirteen is:

"routines."

I was kind of at a loss with this one, so it took me a minute to think of something. Then I thought of what my husband does in the mornings, which is jump in the shower.

the joy of love, day twelve.

2011-02-14T00:05:00.000-05:00

The theme for day twelve of The Joy of Love is:

"the eyes of our loved ones."

You have no idea what a big deal it is that I am getting any photos of my husband at all. He has been so gracious and such a good sport, even though I know he would much rather NOT be the subject of Niki's lens. After several attempts, I finally got a couple of shots of his eyes.

the joy of love, day eleven.

2011-02-13T23:48:00.000-05:00

The theme for day eleven of The Joy of Love is:

"dreams."

My husband loves to sing. He has a great voice, but very little confidence. Still, one can find him at any given moment singing something. It is a secret dream of his.

the joy of love, day ten.

2011-02-10T23:59:00.000-05:00

It is day 10 of Joy of Love. This has been such a fun project to do.

Today's theme is:

"spaces."

My husband has his side of the bed, his side of the bedroom, his side of the closet, his side of the drawers, and his side of the top of the dresser. Those are all his spaces.

Of course, his side of the top of the dresser is smaller than mine. Not because I am controlling or anything like that, but because he just doesn't need as much space as I do. Here is what is occupying his space there.

the joy of love, day nine.

2011-02-09T22:55:00.000-05:00

The theme today is:

"passions and hobbies."

Unfortunately, with my husband's work hours and mine on Wednesdays, I did not have an opportunity to get a photo of him involved with the thing for which he has the most enthusiasm.

He is a car enthusiast.

He has done auto body and paint work since he was fourteen years old. His father showed him how to do it. And he does an amazing job at it. That isn't what he does as a profession now, but it is a skill for which he is totally reasonable and right to charge a LOT of money.

Since we've been married, I have acquired a fondness for old, vintage cars. My husband likes any kind of car, really. But I recall seeing his finished work on older cars (some of which had to have their frames completely rebuilt), and being so impressed with the craftsmanship of the bodies, not to mention his handiwork in all of them. There really is something about a nice, old car, especially one that has been restored.

I have photographed many vehicles that my husband has refurbished, and I found a couple of them to share with you. Mind you, these are not the standard, show-off-the-work images, though I do have those too (just not on my hard drive anymore). These are me wanting to put my own creative stamp on that which he had already made so lovely.

Many thanks to Kelly Willette for hosting this project.

toomuchfood tuesday.

2011-02-09T00:08:00.000-05:00

I had a whole chicken that was sitting in the fridge since the weekend.

I had planned to roast it then, but the weekend got busy and we ended up doing other things for dinner.

So, I made it tonight.

I roasted it on a bed of onions and parsnips.

And I had two plates.

But there is still a decent amount of leftovers, so I reckon we will go ahead and polish it off on Wednesday night in lieu of a crock pot meal.

Anyone have any ideas/suggestions for what I should cook for Crock Pot Wednesday next week?

If not, I'll be making Pot Roast.

the joy of love, day eight.

2011-02-08T23:58:00.000-05:00

The topic for day 8 of The Joy of Love is:

"love from the heart."

For Christmas, my husband got me some things for my camera, including a new lens.

I love my new lens, and I love that my husband was so thoughtful. He's always been super-encouraging of me pursuing my passions, and he has always been my biggest cheerleader. That's actually the best gift, and it's a gift that keeps on giving.

the joy of love, day seven.

2011-02-07T23:38:00.000-05:00

The theme for today is:

"generations."

Now, this one is tricky for me. I don't have any photos readily available of grandparents or other generations of my husband's family, nor was I going to be able to photograph anyone today. Soooo... I wasn't exactly sure what to do here. I decided to see if I could drum up (meaning, if I hadn't deleted them off of my laptop to gain memory yet) some photos of my husband with any of our children when they were wee ones. I did manage to find some.

With Natalie in the hospital (that's Ian in the background.)

With Ian, a week old after we finally brought him home (Bobby's curls in the picture too).

I like these because it was when these little ones were at their smallest (Ian was 5lb 12 oz when we finally got him home).

I look at these old photos and they give me pause. I knew nothing of photography when any of my children were this small. And that fact means absolutely nothing to me. These are some of the most precious, most meaningful, most beautiful photos I've ever taken.

And I love remembering the tiny beginnings of this new generation of our family.

I absolutely adore remembering.

Many thanks to Kelly Willette for hosting this project.

project 52, week five.

2011-02-07T22:37:00.000-05:00

I spent most of yesterday out of the house, and yesterday evening I found that my wireless router did not want to do it's job under any circumstances. Strange.

It's working fine today though, thank goodness. And I am now able to share my photos for the week. It was a much better week, as I have been feeling a lot better (still not out of the woods with this cough though).

Self-portrait.

Family.

Loving my drives in the city.

My iPhonearoid of the week is here.

And my Weekly Vlog is right here.

Have a wonderful week, everyone.

the joy of love, day six.

2011-02-07T22:14:00.000-05:00

The theme for today is:

"the ones they love."

I really loved today's theme. I had the brilliant idea of having my husband hold up photos of his loved ones. Brilliant, right? Like that's never been done before.

And since our little (former) Fro Magnum joined us outside, I got a couple more.

This project is being hosted by Kelly Willette.

technical difficulties.

2011-02-07T10:40:00.001-05:00

My router has been giving me fits the past couple of days. The signal keeps going in and out. I reset it, and it might work, then other times I reset it and it doesn't work. Last night it was not working, so I did not get my vlog, Joy of Love images, or Project 52 images uploaded. I am eager to get all of this work posted! I've had my router for almost a year and it has never given me problems until now. I hope this is not a sign of it's shelf life!

At any rate, we are getting ready for our day at Master's Academy right now. I have a break during third hour, so I hope to sit down and get everything uploaded then. Can't wait to share with you, my beloved tens of readers!

We've had chili for dinner the past two Mondays (yummy!), but tonight is Chick Fil A night after school! Is it weird that I'm already looking forward to that at 10:35 in the morning?

- natty posted this using BlogPress from her iPhone.

the joy of love, day five.

2011-02-05T23:03:00.000-05:00

I am five days into my Joy of Love project, a very fun month-long journal hosted by Kelly Willette. I am glad I decided to participate, as I think at the end of the month I will have something to share with my husband that will show him how much he entertains me, among other things! Which brings us to the theme for today, which is:

"what you love to hate."

What do I love to hate? Is there a habit that my husband has that drives me up the wall?

Well, I guess I could think of a couple of things. But lately, the one thing that has annoyed me (but at the same time entertained me) is the amount of time my husband spends playing Graal on his iPhone.

What's funny is watching him playing. The faces he makes. I should have gotten pictures of that.

the joy of love, day four.

2011-02-04T23:37:00.000-05:00

The theme today is:

"what they wear."

The past couple of days, I have seen precious little of my husband. He had a fourteen-hour day yesterday, and since he started at 1, he did not get off until 3. I, of course, was fast asleep.

Then today, he was off to work, and I ran a bunch of errands in the cold rain before I remembered that I needed to get some kind of shot today! Since he wasn't around, I had to resort to gazing upon what's hanging in our closet.

the joy of love, day three.

2011-02-03T23:30:00.000-05:00

The theme for today's Joy of Love post is:

"Then and Now."

Then.

Now.

Sorta.

This was back in October, but it will have to do tonight. It will be after midnight when my husband gets home. And I'm going to bed now, so I won't be getting a photo of him tonight. He'll probably be very grateful for that.

the joy of love, day two.

2011-02-02T23:33:00.000-05:00

It is Day Two of The Joy of Love (hosted by Willette), and today's theme is:

"how they look."

I love my husband's face. I love his red hair, his chiseled jaw, his bright, blue eyes.

I love how he looks when he's being serious, and completely occupied with something.

And what is he doing being so serious? Playing a video game on his iPhone!

crock pot wednesday: black beans that should never have been.

2011-02-02T23:16:00.000-05:00

I like black beans, and I had a bag on hand. I had never made them in the crock pot, so I found a recipe that looked simple enough for me to throw together in a few minutes.

I shouldn't have.

No. Really.

It wasn't inedible or anything, but it was nothing to write home about.

And what's worse, it gave me the worst stomach ache.

That has never happened to me when I eat black beans. Fail.

I am not even going to share what I did, because I don't think the recipe is worth it. I know there are lots of better black bean recipes out there, and I will find one that is good and make it. But not anytime soon. My stomach needs to recover.

the joy of love, day one.

2011-02-01T23:22:00.000-05:00

I am participating in an online project this month, called The Joy of Love, hosted by Willette. During this project, participants receive daily prompts and they are to take photographs related to those prompts, always focusing on one subject whom they love. I decided to take photos of my husband, because I have so few of him. He does not like having his picture taken, but if you've been reading my blog since last year you know that I decided that we both need to get over that.

Today's prompt was "what they DO."

Since I am not with my husband while he is at work, I could not show you what he does there. And, since he didn't even get home until after 10 p.m. tonight, I did not snap many photos of him. But one was sufficient tonight. When he gets home, he tells me about his day, he sits with his children and hears about their day, and he eats dinner.

project 52, week four.

2011-01-31T22:01:00.000-05:00

Week Four of my Project 52 has not been without its challenges.

Last week, my youngest was sick (she caught what my middle child had the week before) and I caught what she had.

This week, I suffered through the worst of it. Fever, chills, aches, nausea, incessant and painful coughing, alla that. It was soooo much fun.

Somehow I did manage to get some photos taken. Well, it wasn't somehow. It was yesterday, when I felt marginally better.

Self-portrait.

Family.

(I did actually get this one earlier on in the week.)

Out and about.

My iPhonearoid of the week is right here.

And my Weekly Vlog is right here.

Have a great week, everyone.

crock pot wednesday: spicy beef sandwiches.

2011-01-27T12:20:00.000-05:00

Today was just another in a series of BANNER days.

I hope you hear the sarcasm in that.

Since my Ladybug was vomiting last night, I decided that we would not go in to Master's today. Good thing I did, because although she didn't vomit today, she still wasn't well and neither was I. I coughed so hard most of the day it made my chest hurt. Yay.

But I did manage to get dinner in the crock pot.

And what did I make? Something REALLY easy. Spicy Beef Sandwiches.

My ingredients were only two. Well, three actually, including salt. One chuck roast and a jar of mild pepperoncinis.

I put the roast in the pot, seasoned it liberally with salt, dumped the entire jar of pepperoncinis in it, and then added a little bit of water, enough to cover the bottom of the pot. Cooked it on high for five hours, at which time I shredded the beef in the pot with a couple of forks. We then spooned the meat out onto our sandwich bread, covered the meat with some provolone cheese, and ate.

My son had two sandwiches. My husband also had two. We ran out of sandwich bread, and they complained, because they both wanted another sandwich. Or two. They loved it that much. My husband said I should make this often.

The meat wasn't overly spicy, but it did have some heat. Not enough to keep my (newly) three-year old daughter from eating it though. (My finicky son ate the lunch that he didn't eat earlier for dinner.) I also had two sandwiches and I must say, the meat was tasty.

It really doesn't get much simpler than this for a meal.

COST:
roast: $5.28
peppers: $1.72
TOTAL: $7.00

And thankfully, I already have the ingredients on hand for next week's crock pot meal.

three. three children, three birthdays, three birth stories, three videos, three-year old daughter.

2011-01-25T22:38:00.001-05:00

Today is my little Ladybug's birthday.

I love her so much. She's the most awesome little dainty rosebud ever.

All of you, my beloved tens of readers, would love to know her. Actually, you would love to know all of my kids. Because they're grrrreat. What makes my daughter so cool is, she likes all of the best songs. And she has the dopest dance moves. Her laugh is infectious. She loves to read books. She's super creative, and she loves lining her toys in rows. She enjoys shopping, but also making a mess and getting dirty.

How cool is that?

We are postponing her family celebration until tomorrow, because she has thrown up three times so far this evening. That poor Ladybug.

Hopefully she'll feel better tomorrow evening, so I can slap on the tiara and clip-on baby baubles I got for her, and we can do the red velvet cake celebration for the wee lass. Then, this weekend, I'm thinking I might take her out for tea and dress-up fun.

Last year, I shared Natalie's birth story with you. I also made a small video montage of her first year of life. (It was my very first video, so I just laugh now every time I watch it, after I marvel over how small and precious she was. I did a horrible job with the music editing! Hahaha! And most of the pictures are horrible quality because at the time I did not know how to use that Kodak Easy Share camera optimally. It's amazing how much I've learned since I bought Niki. It's also amazing that I used to get way better photos on the regular with DISPOSABLE cameras. I should have just stuck with those instead of that Kodak.) And I posted a Facebook album of photos from her second year of life.

This year, I made a video greeting for each of my children on their birthday. Here is Natalie's.

(If you are interested in seeing my sons' birthday video greetings, here is Bobby's and here is Ian's. I'll also link to their birth stories as well. Bobby's is here and Ian's is here.)

Happy birthday, baby. Mommy loves your beautiful face and your beautiful spirit.

project 52, week three.

2011-01-24T23:08:00.000-05:00

This post is getting to you a day late. I spent most of my weekend tending to my littlest one.

She has not been feeling well the past few days. And before that, my little boy was sick. And now, I've come down with a bad cough. So, the whole week has been sick.

With Ladybug feeling the way she was and not sleeping much the past few days, I just did not get around to typing this post until now.

And this week was a complete bust. I had a slight schedule change at work, which means I am now having to be there earlier on Wednesdays. I didn't manage my time very well this past Wednesday morning, so I did not get my crock pot meal prepared. We ended up having pizza.

I also am not happy with the shots I got this week. Just one of those weeks where it seems I don't know how to use a camera. At all. Everything came out either really crappy or just plain boring. I feel like I am starting all over again, from scratch, after having taken several THOUSANDS of photos last year (I'm not exaggerating). So these shots this week... suck.

But that happens sometimes. Lord knows, last year when I did my 365 project there were several days when I was not enthused by the output. It does not stop me from shooting.

I know this week will be better.

The weather reports are forecasting more snow. Time to freak out.

Self.

Family. So far, my little girl seems to be the star of the family portraits. She's just always right there.

Annnd a heaping of boring un-inspiredness.

My iPhonearoid of the week is here.

And my Weekly Vlog is here.

Sooo, my week was pretty much a heap of crap. I hope yours wasn't.

project 52, week two.

2011-01-16T22:16:00.000-05:00

Week Two has come and gone. And what a strange week it was.

Good strange. Not bad strange.

I am a native of Atlanta, Georgia. I was born and raised here. A Georgia Baptist baby. (Though it's not called Georgia Baptist anymore; it's called Atlanta Medical Center or something like that.)

In all of my thirty-seven years, I have NEVER seen the kind of mayhem that ensued, weather-wise, this week, beginning Sunday night. It really was a snowpocalypse. Snowmaggedon, if you will.

The result? We were snowed/iced in all week.

All. Week.

My husband actually went back to work on Tuesday, but every day we were praying hard that he would make it there and back safely.

No real cabin fever to report. Lots of sleeping in, playing Call of Duty Black Ops and Halo Reach, watching blu-rays and Netflix, and general lounging around. I could have been productive, but I wasn't. No Spring Cleaning for me. It ain't Spring yet.

Ahhhh Spriiiiiing.

Anyway, here are my snapshots for the week.

Self-portrait.

Family portrait.

Sunday night, a couple of hours into the snowstorm.

You can see my iPhonearoid of the week here.

And you can see Weekly Vlog Number Two here.

Have a great week, folks.

crock pot wednesday: the pot of comfort resumes.

2011-01-13T23:48:00.000-05:00

Snowmaggedon. That is how some would describe the winter storm that hit our city on Sunday night. Because of it, we are still snowed/iced in. Many have complained of cabin fever. Me? Nah. I'm very happy to have had this extra week (because all of our out-of-house school days have been cancelled) of Christmas break. Sleeping in and lazing around has felt really good, and I actually feel rested. Plus, it's given my kids the chance to get the last bit of illness out of their systems.

And, it's made me reflect on how happy I am to have plenty of food in the house.

I resumed my weekly crock pot meal schedule today, even though we didn't have Master's Academy. I just wanted to have dinner taken care of and not have to think about it later in the evening. I made a dish that I previously made in the Fall, which was pretty tasty: Peach Salsa Chicken.

You can find the recipe in that post. I will share a few things I changed up here.

First, I made sure that I had boneless chicken.

I used an actual peach salsa this time. In fact, it had mangoes and peaches in it. (Just so you know, mangoes are my absolute favorite fruit, and I have always loved peaches as well, so this was the perfect salsa for me.)

I also used one jar of peaches in 100% fruit juice, because I couldn't find a can of peaches in water at the store this time.

I also seasoned with cumin, because I like it, in addition to some seasoned salt. My only quibble is that I could have been a little more heavy-handed with the seasonings, since I did add more liquid this time. Or maybe I just should have left out the extra liquid. Maybe just enough to line the bottom of the pot.

At any rate, even though I should have seasoned it more liberally, it still came out tasty. It smelled so good, and I didn't even add the other jar of peaches toward the end like I had planned. The peaches in the dish retained a nice amount of sweetness.

Next week, I may revisit that delicious jambalaya.

If you have any good crock pot recipes, please feel free to share them with me. I don't always want to make them up on my own. I'd love to hear from you all.

natty's season of awesome, chapter two.

2011-01-11T23:26:00.000-05:00

This is our second snow day. Tomorrow will be another snow day.

I'm serious. It's a mess down here in the A.

My sweet husby-wusby, bless his heart, he had to go in to work. Luckily, we procured Tina after saying goodbye to Shelly (my little shell of a car), and Tina has four wheel drive. You go girl.

Soooo, he made it to work safely. But. The roads are iced over again, the Perimeter is a mess, and he is basically stuck down there. Not an entirely bad thing, since there is a ton of work that needs to be done down at the job.

But it means that he's spending the night down there. Boo.

So, I postponed enchilada night (always a big hit at our house... my guys LOVE my enchiladas) and am having Lean Cuisine and the kids are having hot dogs and leftover homemade pizza from last night. Tomorrow, I will be jumping right back in to my Crock Pot Wednesdays!

In the meantime, here are some more highlights from our epic family vacation in the Chi, which kicked off an entire season of awesome. It really was the best Autumn ever.

Okay. I am stopping now.

natty's season of awesome, chapter one.

2011-01-10T20:21:00.000-05:00

The latter part of 2010 passed in a blaze of hazy glory. I wish it could have gone by a little bit more slowly. I seem to feel quite often like life is whizzing past me at warp speed, and I am always left catching my breath, even though I don't exactly feel like I was along for the ride. Do you know what I mean?

But I was along for the ride, fast ride that it was. And it was an awesome ride that ended way too abruptly. But alas, such is life... when one gets older, anyway.

I am finally taking the time, while we still have a couple of days of break left (thanks, blizzard!), to share with you some of the awesomeness that was my Autumn season, in pictures and stories. It was a season of adventures, unexpected blessings, and upgrades, and I am so thankful to the Lord for such a peaceful and joyous time.

As you know, we spent a lot of time in Ohio. My husband was working on a project up there. During our stint in Ohio, we were able to take our first-ever family vacation, to Chicago. I had planned on blogging about it right after it happened, but photog-backlog got the better of me (and still has the better of me, even though I now see a very dim spot of light at the end of the tunnel) and it was a couple of weeks before I even got all of the photos done. They have long since been finished, and I now have the time to share a couple of stories for you.

Before I share, let me just tell you that I love Chicago.

I. love. it.

It is a city for which I had some appreciation already, but not that much. I had traveled to Chicago several times when I was a kid, to visit relatives. It was always fun, as much fun as one can have when visiting relatives. I enjoyed being around family and eating and generally doing a whole lot of nothing. I did not, however, see the CITY. Just the South Side. Nothing wrong with the South Side, but it's not the city.

I finally saw the city in 2009, in July. We were there for a week and a half because my husband was working up there. We had the most awesome time; it was unbelievable. And we fell in love with the city.

I am a total city girl anyway. I was born and raised in the city. I love the A, warts and all. And I love big cities. I've lived in London, and it's amazing. I've lived in Mexico and have been to Mexico City twice, and it is indeed big. I don't remember much of Los Angeles, because I was small, but I do recall that it was big. And then there's Miami. I love Miami.

My favorite big city, however, is New York. I love it. So much.

And I love Chicago almost as much. I actually refer to it as Almostnewyork.

With 2009's Chicago trip being so great I had little hope that we would be able to repeat it. We were determined to try, however, since this was our first official family vacation. Ever.

We headed out on the road around nine or ten in the morning. Luckily, Chicago is only a five-hour drive from Dayton. Like Atlanta to Savannah. Easy peasy.

There are lots of farms in Ohio. And Indiana.

We arrived in Chicago and were instantly smitten. Again.

Made it to the hotel, no problem. Then we find out that we have no room booked there. This was after my husband had called earlier in the week and called to confirm on TWO different occasions.

[When I had originally planned to share the highlights of this trip with you back in October, I had planned on giving this post the title of "The Misadventures of Natty's Family in Almostnewyork, Chapter One: How to Not Have a Place to Stay When Visiting a Big City Far Away From Home." I am glad life got in the way and I am just now getting to share this with you guys, because now it's just one big laugh. It actually was by the end of our trip.]

After sitting in the nice hotel lobby for what seemed like almost an hour while my husband was on the phone with the... I guess... reservation people, he informed me that a) they booked us the wrong weekend-- the following weekend, and b) not at this hotel (which was the hotel at which we had wanted to stay and thought we would be staying).

Sooooo, we got back in the car and drove twenty minutes away, to Midway Airport and its neighborhood. Of course, at the time, I was beyond pissed, because there went half of my plans to walk to the Navy Pier and Nordstrom and other places. And here we were, with no view of the city. Stank. Stank. Stank.

Buuuut, as it turned out, the hotel was nice, the neighborhood was nice, there was a Giordano's right down the street (where we ended up having dinner that night), Target was right over the bridge, and the city was actually not nearly as far as it seemed when we first made our way out to the hotel. After a couple of yummy deep dish pizzas, all was right with the world again, and we settled in, ready for all manner of city fun the next few days.

And major city fun was had by all. We took a double-decker tour bus two days in a row (and of course sat on the top deck in the most perfect fall weather imaginable), ate at Bubba Gump's since we liked it so much the year before, and also made it out to Hot Doug's for a couple of his famous hot dogs. We even met Doug himself! He was working the cash register. The experience was worth the hour-long wait in line outside (which we knew about ahead of time).

My oldest son and I took a ride on the Navy Pier ferris wheel, and acted like total little kids. It was our first ferris wheel ride ever! You would have thought we had traveled to outer space, we were so excited.

We caught the tail-end of Jewel's concert at the Chicago Country Music Festival in Millennium Park, which was a total surprise.

We had dinner in Chinatown, and fell in love with it, the food, the bubble teas from Joy Yee's Noodle Shop, and the Water Taxi.

And we took a ride to the top of the Sears Tower. Yes, Sears Tower. I know it's not called that anymore; it's called the Willis Tower. But in my mind it will always be the Sears Tower. My husband punked out before the elevator doors closed and did not go up to the Skydeck with us, but the kids and I had fun seeing the city from such a high perch.

I have tried to spare you a gazillion photos. It was difficult. It's a fairly safe bet that I will share more photos in Chapter Two of this series. This trip was all kinds of awesome and completely made of win, and we walked away with tons of fond memories of our first-ever family vacation. It really did set off Natty's Season of Awesome. And that's a way better title for this post.

Here are just a few more highlights. Did I already mention that I love Chicago? Yes? I'll say it again.

I love Chicago.

I love it so much.

project 52, week one.

2011-01-10T00:03:00.000-05:00

And so it begins. A new year, a new decade.

This first week of 2011 was eventful, to say the least. Hubby and I faced a lot of vehicle drama. Shelly, my little "shell" of a car, was, as we discovered, sicker than we even thought, and definitely on her last leg, which wasn't good. My mother had surgery, probably her last, to give her a new dialysis access. And my kidlets, all three of them, were experiencing varying levels of under-the-weather-ness.

In spite of all of that, I excitedly embarked upon my new photo project, hoping to get some gems this week. What I got I wouldn't necessarily call gems, but I'm not bothered. I know that every week won't be a platinum hit.

I'm still happy with the shots, especially the family ones, because of the subject.

Here they are.

Self-portrait.

Family portrait.

Another family portrait.

Of interest.

Here is the link to my iPhonearoid of the week.

And here is the link to my first weekly vlog of 2011.

Have a great week, folks.

one little word.

2011-01-03T00:03:00.000-05:00

In 2010, my One Little Word was Fearless.

Annnnd I didn't quite live up to that word the entire year.

Fear has always been the main vampire that tries to creep into my life. I've slain it many times, in many different situations, but it seems to morph into some new, uglier iteration of itself and sneak back in.

Well, this year, instead of beating myself up over the times when I totally entertained it instead of putting my foot up its ass and sending it flying out the door, I am going to remind myself of the many times last year that I totally did kick fear in the teeth, and keep those reminders in the forefront of my mind. I know that God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind. As I continue to meditate on that truth, I will continually experience freedom from the bondage of fear and do the things that I am called to do in complete confidence.

It is my intention to remain conscious of this freedom that I already have and walk in it every day, thus eliminating fear from my life permanently. The key is to remember that I really do already have the freedom, because I have a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind. If I already have that, it means that I am already

free.

project 52.

2011-01-02T23:51:00.000-05:00

Last year, I completed my Project 365. It was quite an accomplishment for me, and I am still completely stoked that I started, continued, and finished it. It definitely helped me grow as a photographer.

On the last day of my project, I mentioned that I would use 2011 to do a 52-week project. And that's exactly what I'mma do.

Every weekend, beginning with this coming weekend, I will share with you some highlights of my week. I plan to keep the highlights fairly uniform and consistent. I will include a self-portrait (Yay! I am completely over it!), a family portrait (meaning, a picture of someone in my family or everyone in my family, including or not including me... which means probably some picture of my children), an art portrait, and an iPhonearoid of the week. Squeeee!

Annnd I'll probably throw in some extras each week, just 'cause.

Not only that, but I plan to extend my Project 52 into the video realm, and make a short weekly vlog, which may or may not be completely random. We'll see.

I'm excited for the new year. Niki's got some new accessories and we've already been playing around and enjoying ourselves. I foresee myself taking many more photos for other people this year, as I've already gotten several inquiries. And, I plan to take everything as slowly as I can, and really take in each moment, with one deep breath after another.

my first images of 2011.

2011-01-02T01:03:00.000-05:00

I was out and about quite a bit today, for a number of reasons.

Of course, Niki was at my side, as always.

And we saw many interesting sights today, this first day of 2011.

We're looking forward to making gobs of cool art this year.

And we hope you will join us on our journey.

gaaahhh! where did the end of the year go?

2011-01-01T23:07:00.000-05:00

I cannot believe that I have spent very little time inside my house over the past few days. Between family business and car drama, I've been running here and there and just did get to relax for about an hour or so last night and ring in the new year with my family. I won't get into all of the details, because they're really not important, but suffice it to say, from 19 December until now, I have had precious little time or energy to blog. That means my December Daily and Reverb 10 plans fell by the wayside. Although I finished my December Daily entries and will be putting the entire book together this month, I failed to share all of the entries with you all. My sincere apologies! Sometimes life gets too hectic around here, and/or unexpected things happen.

This is not to say that our holiday season ended with a whimper. It did not. With the exception of my coming down with a bad case of strep throat the week of Christmas (I'm almost at the last day of my antibiotic-taking woohoo!), our holiday season was peaceful, full of blessings and pleasant surprises, and joyous. My husband and I got to play Santa for our little ones, and seeing their faces on Christmas morning was priceless. They have had tons of fun with their new toys.

We have played games, watched movies, had quiet meals, and just enjoyed each other.

And now, we've entered a new year, full of hope and new goals. I, of course, have my list of goals and look forward to seeing what I am able to accomplish. I also look forward to watching our family grow in resolve and love. The trials we faced in 2010 definitely shaped our character in new ways and we are thankful for the Lord's grace to overcome the obstacles. I realize that this year won't be without its trials, as life never is without trials, but God is always with us, and that is a fact that I won't be so easily tempted to forget this year, or ever again.

As for my goals, I will share some of them with you now.

I plan to promote my business in the ways that I failed to do last year.

Wow. It's weird saying last year. Seeing as how yesterday was last year. Anyway...

I fell off the water wagon around Thanksgiving. I plan to get back on the wagon. I have some pounds that I need to lose, so my goal is to walk and water-drink them off.

I also plan to make more videos for my YouTube channel. There will be videos of me singing, making art and art journaling, taking pictures, documenting my hair growth journey (which I fear has suffered a few setbacks), and probably random, short clips of my kids doing silly things.

And there's my new project... Project52.

I'll share the details of that, along with my One Little Word for 2011, tomorrow.

a real break.

2010-12-29T00:07:00.000-05:00

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas.

Our Christmas was lovely, in spite of a bad case of strep throat, which I caught last week. My throat started really hurting the Sunday before Christmas, when we were in Ohio. By Monday, I couldn't talk, had a fever as well as aches all over, and my throat was swollen beyond recognition. And, of course, it hurt to swallow. Bad timing, since that Monday was my wedding anniversary.

Needless to say, I was miserable, and in a lot of pain. I was taking 400 mg of Ibuprofen every couple of hours, just to take some of the edge off. But I had little energy to do anything, least of all blog.

I still have several days of antibiotics to take, and there's a tiny but of soreness left in my throat, but I feel a lot better. I wasn't expecting to take a break from blogging, but the illness kind of forced my hand. (Now I'm marveling at the fact that I did any blogging at all during the holidays last year. Things were pretty hectic then, and they were pretty hectic last week.) I couldn't bail from the family gatherings and the last-minute shopping, but everything else definitely took a back seat.

I will spend the next few days catching up on some of the December Daily and Reverb '10 posts. I plan to be caught up with those by New Year's Eve, plus I want to share some highlights of this season (meaning Autumn going into Winter) with you. And I look forward to connecting with many of you again.

december daily, day eleven.

2010-12-16T20:06:00.001-05:00

We had my oldest son's birthday party today. He will be turning fourteen the day after Christmas, but we have learned that the 26th is not the best day to have a party, because lots of people are out of town or visiting with family or what have you. Last year, we had it on the busiest shopping day of the year, at the mall food court. It was totally chaotic, but not for us, since we were there for a party. It worked out, because parents just dropped their kids off and then went out into the mall and got some shopping done. It was a lot of fun.

Today was a lot of fun as well. We had it at a place a couple of minutes from my house, called Pure Taqueria. It is a very cool restaurant, and one whole side of it was reserved just for his party. They have an upper deck that we originally wanted to use, but they closed that down last week for the winter.

Having it inside turned out to be awesome anyway. The weather was great; it wasn't too cold out and it didn't rain until later on tonight. Bobby had probably thirty or more people at the party, and they all had a blast. I did not take as many pictures as I wanted, since I was hosting the party, but I did get some and will post them on his actual birthday. Meanwhile, I am going to write a short journaling piece for today's entry and, with his permission, take a few quotes from some of his birthday cards and add those as well.

He made out like a bandit. $20 in Starbucks money, $45 in iTunes money, $115 in cash to go toward the purchase of his DJ set, and a RED UKELELE, which he is totally is going to teach me to play. To see him be so blessed by all of his friends really blessed me.

After the party, he went to a play with some of his friends and then another friend's 18th birthday party at IHOP. I picked him up at 11:30. What a social life this kid has got.

december daily, day ten.

2010-12-16T19:40:00.000-05:00

I had lunch with my bestie today. She is so much fun, and we always have a blast when we hang out. Later on in the evening she met the kidlets and me at the mall, and we did some shopping! She got me a $50 gift card to Sephora for my birthday, so I needed to spend it. We both needed moisturizer! And we both needed Sephora! *giggles*

Once we had gotten our goods at Sephora, we got some Starbucks and chilled in the food court before heading to Hot Topic. My son wanted to look at the vinyl albums, and I ended up buying him his first one as an early birthday present: Invaders must Die by The Prodigy. The bestie got a few things she needed, and I also bought a pin for my coat that says, "OMG. A Double Rainbow!"

Then we meandered through the mall, toward Macy's. Because she needed more ornaments for her tree (mushrooms and gnomes!), AND because all of this goodness was beckoning to us:

A pink tree!!!

I'm kind of in love with it.

It was all so marvelous, not to mention the varieties of mushrooms and gnomes that we found. Oddly enough, my tree is up and lit but I haven't put my ornaments on it yet! I'll dig them out soon. Really.

december daily, day nine.

2010-12-14T23:08:00.000-05:00

Poinsettias. They ARE December.

I decided I wanted to include a photo of poinsettias somewhere in my December Daily album, and I happened to see these today. What happy plants these are.

Is there something simple that screams December for you?

11 things.

2010-12-14T22:55:00.000-05:00

December 11 – 11 Things What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

1. More distractions. Guess I didn't really need to get an XBox 360 and replace that Wii and subscribe to Netflix.

2. Fear. I am so done with it.

3. Late nights. Yes, I am a night owl, but I really do want to turn over a new leaf and go to bed earlier.

4. Pounds. I gained weight at some point this year and am kind of disgusted with myself for it. Don't know when exactly it happened, but I was frolicking merrily along towards a familiar and comfortable size 8 when all of a sudden I was a size 12. And I refuse to buy bigger clothes. I did that once with the jeggings and that's IT. No more. Darnit.

5. Large pores. About a month ago, I was minding my own business when suddenly (it seems) I aged overnight. Not happy. I looked in the mirror one morning and I had these pores around my nose that looked like polka dots, they seemed so big. Ugh.

6. Fear. I am OVER IT.

7. Bad reports. Bad doctor reports, bad work reports, bad reports of any kind.

8. More sugar. I completely fell off the water wagon at Thanksgiving, and am determined to get back on. Or in. Or whatever. And stop drinking so many sugary drinks. Namely, sweet tea. One glass a day instead of a few glasses a day.

9. Stress. Of any kind.

10. Joint pain. In my left knee. I WILL find a way to get rid of it.

11. Fear.
I know I've already said it.
It bears repeating.

How will I eliminate them? One breath and one prayer at a time.

Except Number One. Probably not going to actually eliminate it. Just keeping it one hundred witchall.

wisdom.

2010-12-14T22:28:00.000-05:00

December 10 – Wisdom Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? (Author: Susannah Conway)

The wisest decision I made this year, and perhaps in several years, was the decision to allow my husband to be who is supposed to be in our marriage.

You see, I was so used to being independent and handling things myself and pulling myself up by my own bootstraps and getting things done, even if I got them done poorly or haphazardly or not at all, that I didn't realize that after several years of marriage I was STILL doing independent me. I thought I had stopped. I hadn't. I thought I was holding it down for my husband. Instead, I was holding him down. A lot of problems we had last year and going into this year were due to us both not handling our responsibilities. We failed to handle them because of ignorance, not defiance.

He was perfectly happy letting me handle practically everything, because he was working like a dog. He always worked like a dog. And I handled everything else, even though I was completely in over my head and was not doing a good job at all of handling said else. So our house was out of order.

It took a rude awakening and someone on the outside looking in to help us see where we were going astray. I stopped operating as an unmarried single parent, as it were, and my husband gladly began to shoulder his responsibilities. We were instantly less stressed, hidden resentments disappeared, and we experienced a new level of peace in our marriage and home. It was a lesson learned the hard way, but it was an excellent lesson and one which resulted in my humble decision. The subsequent rewards were totally worth learning the lesson, even if it was the hard way.

beautifully different.

2010-12-13T00:20:00.000-05:00

December 8 – Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful. (Author: Karen Walrond)

What makes me different?...

In many situations, on an almost daily basis, my skin color makes me different. But that's not anything new. It's always been that way for me, oddly enough. I rarely even notice anymore.

I grew up in the hood. All of the neighborhood kids would tease me for "talking proper." Even there, I guess I was different. It was aggravating.

My name makes me different. I hated my name when I was a child. I liked absolutely nothing about it. No one could pronounce it or spell it, and my last name was weird. I didn't like my middle name either.

I liked reading books and listening to classical music, things that none of the other kids around me particularly liked. Annnd I got teased for it.

I have a random dent in the right side of my head. I am not sure it was always there; the first time I ever noticed it, I was in the seventh grade. It is rather odd. Certainly different.

I was definitely different when I lived in Mexico, but not so different that people did not assume I was Latina. I was always asked if I was Cuban or Panamanian. It was amusing.

And now, I have reached a point in my life (does it happen to everyone when they reach their mid/late 30's?) where I actually appreciate everything that makes me different. I don't mind "talking proper." I have learned to live with the dimple in my temple. And I love my name, even if, for the rest of my life, I will be referred to as Natalie or Madeline every time I introduce myself to someone new. I love my middle name equally as much. Both of my names have stellar meanings, and I am stoked that my parents gave them to me. And my maiden name? Makes it very easy to search my family history, since it's so uncommon. In fact, there is a very real chance that I am related to every person that shares my maiden name. A welcome, beautiful difference.

As for what I do that makes people light up, I would like to think that the answers to that are: smile, laugh, hug, sing, joke, and show up.

community.

2010-12-13T00:01:00.001-05:00

December 7 – Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011? (Author: Cali Harris)

There are a few communities that I discovered this year that have helped inspire and motivate me. The community that Tasra Dawson built through her Project365 last year was awesome. Through that I was able to make a few new, wonderful friends, Tasra herself being one of them. I've also met some fabulous people through a couple of online blog communities and art communities. And since I started my "unofficial" hair growth challenge a few months ago, I have been slowly discovering the immense natural hair community and meeting some lovely ladies through it.

These are all places where I hope to make more contributions and friends, and build the relationships that have already been formed. I am glad that I have been able to get to know so many gifted people. I'd also like to meet more home cooks, more homeschooling moms that have children that are my children's age, and musicians. Maybe I'll even start my own online community: homeschooling photographer musician artist mothers who cook and sing and love opera and jazz and literature and art journaling. And mid-century modern design. And wearing afros.
Haha. I'm thinking I might be the only one in that community.

december daily, day eight.

2010-12-12T23:40:00.000-05:00

Today was the last day before Christmas Break at Master's Academy. The kids had a colonial feast and dressed up in colonial/Baroque costumes, and my music classes performed an English country dance for the history classes.

In one of my classes, a student drew this on the board:

And this is pretty much why I love my job.

december daily, day seven.

2010-12-12T23:33:00.001-05:00

Tonight, I made this soup. A very quick Pasta e Fagioli. It was ready in about thirty minutes. I will probably make it next week since it's so easy. Also because I forgot the spinach. I will be including the recipe in today's entry.

Swirl some olive oil in the pot.
Add about a teaspoon of anchovy paste. (I used an anchovy fillet this time, but hated that there were soooo many bones. Using paste from now on.)
Add a couple of teaspoons of tomato paste, and a couple of smashed cloves of garlic. (Tonight I used minced garlic because I thought I didn't have any garlic cloves left on hand. I forgot that I actually did.)
Mash it all together, and once it is heated and mixed, add about a quart of chicken stock. Bring it to a rolling boil, then add the tortellini pasta. About five minutes into the pasta cooking, add a can of rinsed cannellini beans, along with several basil leaves torn into pieces, some dried oregano, salt, and pepper.
Right before the pasta is done (after about ten minutes), add a cup of fresh spinach (which I forgot). When the spinach has wilted, the soup is ready. Garnish with parmesan cheese, even if it's the fake kind.

december daily, day six.

2010-12-11T00:36:00.000-05:00

One more Monday to go before we are off for a welcomed, month-long break. Tonight, it's Outback Steak for dinner.

make.

2010-12-10T23:38:00.000-05:00

December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it? (Author: Gretchen Rubin)

The last thing I made was actually food. It was good food.

I make food on the regular anyway, but this was most excellent.

It was my crock pot jambalaya.

I have been doing crock pot meals every Wednesday this Fall, since Wednesdays are very hectic. This jambalaya is not the last thing that I made in the crock pot, but it is the last thing that I made in it where I felt like I was doing something really creative.

As for something that I want to make, but need to clear some time for it? Gaaahhh where do I start??

Artwork for over my bed, finish my daughter's book of colors, my dining room wall collage, graffiti-ing up my son's new bed, and food... ropa vieja... coconut cake... basil coconut chicken curry... more shrimp and grits...

Too many things to list.

december daily, day five.

2010-12-10T23:05:00.000-05:00

We went to Chuck E. Cheese today for a birthday party. One of Ian's classmates turned five, and he also attended Ian's party the week before. Ian's party was also at Chuck E. Cheese, so that was two trips to the magical pizza wonderland in one week. Fitting for us though, since my little ones' first time ever at Chuck E. Cheese was Ian's party. They had been saying how they wanted to go to Chuck E. Cheesus for a while now.

Yes. "Cheesus." Like Jesus.

They had a blast today just like they did last week. I also got to have a little fun too. I love skee ball so I got a lot of tickets that way. Here are some highlights of our fun time today.

I love that last one. It looks like it's some kind of scene out of 'Doctor Who' or something.

let go.

2010-12-09T23:49:00.000-05:00

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)

This year, I have attempted to let go of fear.

My One Little Word for 2010 is 'Fearless.'

I've done pretty well most of the year, especially since I felt like the crappy beginning of the year kind of forced me into walking fearlessly.

By the middle of the year, however, I suffered a minor setback that had me doubting my abilities as a photographic artist and wondering if I should even be trying to build a business. My husband helped me snap out of it, and I continued to promote my business in the small ways I was already doing.

But in the back of my mind, those seeds of doubt still tried to take root and grow, and it has been an uphill battle for me since August. I had a road map in place, some plans to promote my business in new, larger ways, and I followed through with none of them. None of them.

Sigh.

Soooo, needless to say, I have failed in living up to my one little word this year. I don't think I am going to repeat it next year though. The past couple of months I have been thinking a lot about the things that hold me back and keep me from doing what I believe I have been given a gift to do. I am done being fearful of rejection or failure. I am just going to press forward in this new year and let the chips fall where they may, and maybe there will be some success. Regardless, I will not let fear continue to dictate my actions anymore.

crock pot wednesday: holiday hiatus.

2010-12-08T23:30:00.000-05:00

I hope you all are having a marvelous December so far. I am.

I gave my mother a body lotion set for her birthday today, because we both have a thing for lotions and potions and creams.

I said "Merry Christmas" and "See you next year" to all of my students at the Woodstock school today. We are officially on break. One more day at the Marietta school, then one more day at Classical for my eighth-grader, and we will be officially on TOTAL break. Woohoohoohoohoo.

I am currently locked in a post-processing dungeon, finishing photos from two different shoots that I did last week. No complaints here though; I love that part of my job. But due to the time crunch I have been devoting almost every minute of my computer time to these photos, and thus have a couple of December Daily posts and Reverb '10 posts on which to catch up.

And, I haven't cooked anything in my crock pot this month.

Last Wednesday was my birthday and I had a full day from start to finish, beginning with the morning. I had planned on going out to eat with my kids that night, but that didn't even happen. At the moment, I can't remember what we ate!

Then tonight, I had no plans of cooking since I made a quick Pasta e Fagioli soup last night and reheated the rest tonight. It was yummy.

Next Wednesday we will be on the road, making what will be our last trip up to Ohio. My husband is nearing the end of his work up there, and we'll be going up to get him and our things. Needless to say, no crock pot meal will be happening.

And so, I'm thinking I will take December off from the weekly crock pot meals, since the main reason I am doing them anyway is to have something ready for dinner when we get home from Master's Academy on Wednesdays. Since we are on a break from Master's Academy, I will take a break from the Wednesday crock pot meals and resume in January.

I will still be using my crock pot, however. At the very least, it will be used to make Wassail overnight on Christmas Eve, a tradition at my house. Waking up to the smell of Wassail wafting through the house on Christmas morning is pretty heavenly.

wonder.

2010-12-07T01:24:00.001-05:00

December 4 – Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year? (Author: Jeffrey Davis)

We took our kids to the lake.

I stood on a glass platform and saw the city beneath my feet. I got a couple of my children to do it too. My husband? No such luck.

I rode on a ferris wheel for the first time ever.

I made road trips. Several road trips. Long road trips. And enjoyed the scenery along the way.

I stopped to smell the flowers.

I took pictures of beautiful young people.

I spent quality time with my husband.

And I marveled at the wonder in my children's faces.

And it was all very, very wonderful.

december daily, day four.

2010-12-06T14:12:00.001-05:00

For today's December Daily installment, I will be including a photo that a friend took. We went out on this rainy Saturday night, I and seven girlfriends, to eat and celebrate my birthday. It was the 3rd annual Natty's Birthday Girl's Night Out! We went out to an Asian fusion place, and had a grand old time.

I spent the earlier part of the day cooped in my cozy little home, away from the harsh elements, working feverishly on photos from two shoots that I did this week. So, when it came time to go out, I was ready for a few hours of girly time with my friends. My son, being the amazing son that he is, babysat the kidlets for me and they watched movies and had Steak and Shake. Netflix is AWESOME, if you don't know.

Since the photo was taken by my friend, I don't actually have it yet. So I will probably do a little bit of journaling and include the photo later. Somewhere in the journaling I will include the fact that 125 people sent me a birthday greeting on my actual birthday. That was the illest. :)))

december daily, day three.

2010-12-05T01:12:00.000-05:00

I spent this evening shooting pictures for one of my students' Sweet Sixteen birthday party. So many of my students and former students were there. I was happy to be in their midst, snapping away, watching them have fun and enjoying the camaraderie.

On my way home, I realized that I had wanted to do some photos for today's December Daily entry, and I had yet to shoot any. So I observed my surroundings, looking for some cheery Christmas decor. I found this lovely tree in Acworth.

Of course, since I was in my car, driving, I could not look through the viewfinder or compose a shot or anything like that. I just pointed Niki in the general direction of the tree and hoped for the best (my M.O. whenever I am on the road).

That last one is actually a photo of some lighted wreaths on a bridge, and I wanted to catch some of their lights before I went under the bridge.

So, am I actually using these?

You bet I am. I totally love them.

moment.

2010-12-05T00:52:00.000-05:00

December 3 – Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors). (Author: Ali Edwards)

It's hard for me to zero in on just one from this year, and that's a good thing.

I'll pick this one.

The moment my oldest son and I took a ride on the ferris wheel at the Navy Pier in Chicago.

I am soooo late in sharing all of this with you (our family vacation this year), but now's as good a time as any to start. I'll start from the beginning on Sunday. But for now, let me just tell you about this ferris wheel ride.

It was the first time either of us had ever been on a ferris wheel. My husband stayed with the kidlets on the ground. Namely because he is a wee bit afraid of heights. (He has, however, completely conquered his fear of flying, and doesn't mind being on a plane.)

Bobby and I were so excited. The ferris wheel is huge, and moves very slowly. We were told that it used to have cars on it that would hold sixty passengers apiece. I think all five of us would have fit in our car, with Natalie's stroller folded up.

Anyway, Bobby and I ooohed and aaahhhhed the whole way around that thing. We could see the entire city skyline, all of the pier, and of course the gorgeous blue water of Lake Michigan. It was a gorgeous, sunny October day and the sun was thinking about setting but not beginning to set at that point. The light was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

We were both like tiny little kids who were at the circus for the first time or something. It was funny. I snapped photo after photo, marveling at all of the details on the ground below us. And when the time came to get off, it was kind of a bummer.

Here are a few of the photos I took on the ferris wheel. I took several iPhonearoids too, but I'll share those another time.

december daily, day two.

2010-12-03T23:26:00.000-05:00

So, I got this AWESOME holiday journal kit from Evalicious a couple of weeks ago! I am sooo excited to use it for my December Daily album! It is off the chain.

I still haven't gotten a binder to contain all of December Daily goodness yet, but I am shopping around. I've seen several great ideas on Ali Edwards' Flickr page for the group... so, I don't know... maybe I'll make my own cover. But for now, I'm trying to decide what I will do with all of my goodies! I'll probably get some prints of some photos next week and put the first several pages together.

Yesterday I showed you what's going on for Day One, and I'm thinking a 1 1/2 page spread, or a two-page spread with smaller-sized photos. Maybe I'll make a triptych out of them and use them across two pages. Not sure yet...

For Day Two, I'm going to include something I wrote to enter a giveaway. The giveaway was for a copy of "The Beauty of Different," the new book by Karen Walrond, better known as Chookooloonks. To enter I had to write why I am beautiful. This is what I wrote:

I am beautiful because although I may look weathered, I have overcome every trial that has come my way and not self-destructed.

I am beautiful because I feel that way when I am in my husband's arms.

I am beautiful because my children's faces light up when they see me after a long day, and because my eyes dance when I see them.

I am beautiful because the children that I teach tell me that I am smart. Funny. And pretty. And they do so with the most sincere hearts.

And I am beautiful because the laugh lines around my eyes are more apparent now.

And now, for some quick pics of my awesome journal kit! Squeeee!

A bag (a. BAG.) of goodies that came with the kit. Buttons, papers, fabric, ribbons, tags, you name it.

One of the transparency pages. You can see the corrugated cardboard and another glittery piece (that I inserted there) underneath.

I think I'm gonna use this calendar card for part of Day One, and circle my birthday. I may use it before the pages with the Day One photos.

Evalicious ROCKS. This whole kit is SO my style. Here's a page out of a hymnal, with some paper snowflakes stitched along the side. Hotness.

A vintage-looking card piece. Yay.

Another page with stitching on it in the background--the graph paper page.

But LOOK AT THIS OLD HANDWRITTEN NOTE! From 4 August 1930!!! HOW AWESOME IS THAT?! That's definitely going to be opposite one of my photo pages.

A stitched transparency page.

More goodies that came with the kit. Yayyyy.

That's just a sample of some of the pages and SOME of the goodies that came in the kit. Can you tell I'm excited? If not, let me just tell you. I'm excited.

writing.

2010-12-02T23:36:00.000-05:00

December 2 Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?
(Author: Leo Babauta)

I think I spend too much time on my computer, doing useless things. I've always loved surfing the internet, and since 1996 I've logged in a lot of hours doing things that don't really amount to much. Entertainment, shopping, games--there sure are a lot of ways to waste time. That is something I could definitely change.

A few months ago, I started doing just that. I would give myself a half-hour per task on my computer. A half-hour to check email, a half-hour to be on Facebook and Twitter, and a half-hour to read blogs. The things that I deemed important, working on photography and my own blog, were the only things to which I would devote more time.

It has worked out, although lately I have found that YouTube has been jockeying for a position on my list of "obsessions." I'm currently trying to effectively curb the amount of time I spend there too.

and so, the best month of the year begins.

2010-12-02T00:04:00.000-05:00

I am doing my first ever December Daily! I'm so excited.

Here are my images that I plan to use for today, the first of December. I'll probably find some kind of birthday-themed stuff and post it in there too, since today was my birthday.

Tomorrow I will show off my album!

This morning.

This afternoon.

This evening.

And that was Day One.

homeschooling log 2010: chapter eight: what will we do during advent?

2010-12-01T23:47:00.001-05:00

So, I love December.

It's my favorite month. For a number of reasons.

It's my birthday month (December 1.)

It's also my anniversary month (December 20).

One of my children also has a birthday this month (December 26), as does my mother (December 8).

It is the culmination of my favorite season of the year, Autumn.

But most of all, it's Christmastime.

I am one of those oddball people that thinks if this time of year doesn't make you happy inside, not even in the slightest way, or if you hate Christmas music, or anything having to do with this time, then something's off with you.

There really is something in the atmosphere at this time of year. It's almost tangible.

I believe it is the anticipation of the glory that comes upon the celebration of the birth of Christ.

Advent is a celebration, if you will, of that anticipation. It is a time when people focus on Jesus and the meaning of his birth, life, and subsequent death and resurrection.

I decided to teach my little ones about advent this year. I know many people use advent calendars, or advent boxes, or Jesse trees, but I am doing something different.

Since I am a singer, and my children love it when I sing to them, I am going to teach them a Christmas carol, a Nativity-focused song, each day until December 25.

They may not remember them right away, but I have decided that this is going to be a new tradition for us and over the years these songs will become solid in their hearts and minds and they will always remember Mommy singing to them. And they will especially remember the meaning of Christmas thanks to learning these songs. That is my hope, anyway.

This isn't to say we won't be singing songs like "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer," "Jingle Bells," or "Jingle Bell Rock." We will. I love all Christmas songs. I will just be concentrating on teaching my little ones these Nativity-focused ones.

Next week, I will share a week's worth of songs in a new chapter of the homeschooling log. But for today, since we just started, I will share with you the song that I taught them today. Maybe I will record these too...

God rest you merry, gentlemen, let nothing you dismay;

remember Christ our Savior was born on Christmas day

to save us all from Satan's power when we were gone astray.

O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy;

O tidings of comfort and joy.

From God our heavenly Father a blessed angel came,

and unto certain shepherds brought tidings of the same,

how that in Bethlehem was born the Son of God by name.

O tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy;

O tidings of comfort and joy.

Incidentally, a good friend of mine looked up my name, Natalyn, and found out that it means "Beautiful Tender Lake/Waterfall Christmas/Birth Day." So, that's extremely happy.

one word.

2010-12-01T22:53:00.000-05:00

December 1 One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
(Author: Gwen Bell)

This one is easy.

Unlike my One Little Word for 2010 which was Fearless, the word that I would use to describe how this year went is this:

Redemptive.

You see, 2010 began in the suckiest way possible. I mean, it was ROTTEN. My husband and I faced a number of circumstances that were beyond our control and left us completely dejected. It was a real shock to our system, considering how amazing all of 2009 had been up until the very end. And when the end came, it hit us like a giant, stinky rock of slimy crap.

Those first couple of months we pretty much inhaled and exhaled. We did what we knew to do daily, and closed our eyes at night. We learned who our real friends are and we held onto each other tight. We also held onto our faith and had to remind ourselves daily that faith is indeed the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. We were seeing nothing at the time that would give us any incentive to hope that things would get better any time soon, and yet we had to dig our heels in the sand and believe beyond belief that things would get better, and soon.

Then one day, a day like any other day, things turned around, literally. Just. Like. That.

We didn't see it coming, but almost an instant restoration occurred. It was like life went back to normal for us practically overnight, and the two months that began the year were just some strange hiccup at best and a terrible nightmare at worst. The cloud of despair that was hell-bent on raining depression and hopelessness and strife on us dissipated, and the sun shone as brightly as it ever had.

It was as if we had gone through some test to see if we could hold onto our joy and peace, even if it was by the tips of our slippery fingernails, and we had managed to hold on successfully and pass the test. We definitely learned some lessons through it all, and corrected some issues in our marriage. As a result, the subsequent joy and peace was exponentially more than we even had before. Amazing.

The whole of 2010 has met us with such good fortune, even moreso than the whole of 2009. We are truly blessed, and grateful for the Lord's grace. It really is AMAZING grace. Sure, we have faced our trials this year, as we always do, but something in us has changed this year and the trials we face don't hit us as hard as they used to. We have been bona fide witnesses to the redemptive power of God in our lives. I am really a little sad to see the year go.

And so, looking back over this post, I noticed that I used the words joy, peace, and amazing a few times. Any one of those would be a perfect word to encapsulate the end of my 2011. I'm excited to see which word ends up on top.